. . . . And now I am done.

Many of my friends who are not adopting have no idea what has gotten my panties in a wad. To sum it up:

1. There are unethical adoption practices going on in Viet Nam right now. EGADS!!!!!! THAT has NEVER happened before . . . . not in ANY country!!! The hysteria calls for the program to be shut down. Mainly by people who are kissing their ETHICALLY adopted children goodnight every night. They would have everyone believe that their adoptions didn't fall prey to what they are assuming many other adoptions are falling prey to as we speak. Now, I am officially going on record (as if I have to) as stating that I absolutely want no part of an adoption that was rooted in extortion, coersion, baby-stealing or any other act that isn't humanitarian in nature. I am not so desperate to be a mother that I would want to rob another family of their right to raise their own child. My agency has been run through every conceivable check I could run them through and have passed mine and several other civic, humanitarian, and morally-minded people's litmus test as an ethical agency. They are even on the "Adoption Agencies I approve of" list of one of the more popular blogs. One of the blogs that seem to be respected by all the people calling for radical shut downs. I say this so that I am not accused of "defending" my agency; as I stated below, my agency doesn't need defending. So what is my problem and why am I putting a dog in this fight? People that I have grown fond of in this process are feeling as though their dreams of parenthood are going to be shattered and they have made horrific choices; their agencies aren't as perfect and ethical as the ONE AGENCY that keeps popping up on everyone's blog as ethical. I find it ironic that ONE agency keeps popping up time and time again as the GOLD STANDARD of ethics. Surely, proponents and subscribers of their service cannot seriously think theirs is the agency of choice among those most moral amongst us. Having said that, other people I have grown quite fond of use this agency as well. I find it rather easy to respect them and the choice they made while they went about building their family and I do not want anything I state here to sound contrary to that. I just wish that attitude could be adopted by others before they commence ripping PAP's to shreds without having sufficient information. And lest those of you doing the ripping think you have ALL the information, let me assure you, you do not. I don't proclaim to either which is why I can't place people under the Cyber Firing Squad.

2. Stop-gaps have been instituted to help remedy the adoptions that have taken place that are just starting to appear to officials as inappropriate, unethical, or illegal. I support this entirely. I am a proud American who supports any time my government takes steps to treat ALL people in a respectful and humanitarian fashion and seeks to eliminate corruption. I have also let them know that. I'm not sure if they care whether or not I support them, but it was important to me and my tax dollars paid for the phone they used to listen to me. I feel better already. Now, having stated that, I absolutely do not believe this "unethical, illegal activity" just started. I absolutely do not believe VN is the only country with these issues. I absolutely believe that as long as human nature is flawed, corrupt people will be corrupt and all of our best efforts can't stop them completely. I believe the US is doing the very best it can to continue to offer families who want (need) children the opportunity to be matched with children who NEED loving homes. I believe that their continued willingness to do this with the country of Viet Nam will serve a far greater humanitarian effort than to simply "shut it down". That isn't a solution. How simple-minded for anyone to think so or to suggest such. I trust that our government with a co-op of adoption professionals, AP's, PAP's, country officials, etc. can do better than that and I think they are trying.

3. I work in a field that affords me access to Immigration officials that I didn't realize I had until last week. I found great comfort in having that access this week. I also found great comfort in learning that while problems have been identified, solutions have been identified also. Adoption/Immigration officials in ALL countries are on a regular cycle of looking to improve practices, as well they should be. These are children, after all, and they deserve all of our best efforts to protect them. After my discussion via telephone, I went back and reread the "official statement" provided. It was easier to read between the lines of what was being said through less panic-stricken eyes. Again, I support my government in their efforts to protect the innocent. I understand now, that protection is not to the exclusion of placing children in need with families who wish to love and care for them nor is that on the immediate horizon. This conversation was reiterated in several other phone conversations yesterday. Over and over again, all the important players in my adoption world are seemingly on the same page. That page seems to read that there are issues that are being addressed and agencies/provinces that need reform and there is a commitment to make that happen.

No one needs to run through the village torching anything.

4. I 1000% agree with Jenna on this post: http://babystoll.blogspot.com/2007/11/keep-on-keeping-on.html

5. I wrote out a rhetorical question to those that have their children home already. After careful consideration, I felt that not posting it at this time would be a wiser choice as my goal here is not to cause grief or pain to anyone. It is to help calm an unsettling batch of news in our worlds as of late. Reading the blogs of those whose children are home, has been a great source of joy for me in the past and gave me hope that I too, might someday get to be a mom. I am sorry to say that is no longer the case since a few of them feel the need to vilify others with shocking righteousness. I surely will miss seeing how their precious children are growing and learning and loving.

Now . . . I am going to get back to my brand of blogging and enjoying my adoption process with other people who wish to do the same. I meant what I said about discussing this over the phone if there are any takers. I won't allow you to litter my blog with puke and venom.